Velo Bella :: La Gazzetta

December 2004

12/01/04 - Bras and Baboons
by Tracie Nelson
What better way to escape holiday stress and simultaneously ignore ridiculous school work than to join myBbellas on a delicious ride through the serene peninsula landscape?

It was bitter cold as I dragged myself out of bed to prepare runny oatmeal in the natural darkness. Confused, my nerves went into a tizzy - oatmeal? early? drive with a bike? I must be racing?

Indeed not, thank the ambiguous super-being above - and as I met my ridemates outside a frosty coffee shop the aura was one of traditional winter weekends in bikeland - long slow miles and plenty of chatty gossip.

We twisted our way through redwood forests on degraded, Copperopolis-esque roads climbing into nowhere-land, descended to the coast and spun along beachside highways, and returned via narrow adventurous climbs. Topics of intense debate included:

a. The Velo Girls' bras
b. Eric Wholberg is too old for me?
c. The act of wearing Velo Bella 2003 (red chamois) shorts inside-out to look like a babboon - a practice with which Jen Chapman appeared all too familiar

Regarding part a:
Yes yes, sports bras are all well, good and fine, but Velo Bella has a new underwear uniform for 2005. Warming up on our trainers at downtown criterium venues we may be spotted in lacy Victoria's Secret push-up bras with sheer undershirts layered above. This will surely make us united, intimidating, and faster.

Regarding part b:
This topic arose in the latter part of our ride - while climbing a long steady grind, who should come flying by our group in a vision of speedy musculature? But the man behind the legs himself. If you are unfamiliar with what I am referring to, I suggest you educate yourself immediately.

An encounter with fame being not enough for our small group, we informed him of his infinite Velo Bella fanbase. Modest, but secretly excited I'm sure, the legs road away in effortless speed.

Part c speaks for itself.

Five hours after our departure, returning to our humble beginnings, our group settled into the cozy coffee shop for pumpkin bread and hot drink. Our gossip extinguished for the week and tired from our adventures, we went our seperate ways.